I decided, 10 minutes ago, that whenever the date's numbers are the same (9/09/09) we celebrate Dwight Schrute! (From, the TV show, The Office.) :)So this post is a dedication to Dwight Schrute and his awesomeness.
Schrute Quotes:
"In the wild, there is no health care. In the wild, health care is, 'Ow, I hurt my leg. I can't run. A lion eats me. I'm dead.' Well, I'm not dead. I'm the lion. You're dead."
"The problem, Jim, is that people who are really suffering from a medical condition won't receive the care they need because someone in this office is coming up with ridiculous stuff. Count Choculitis....Why did you write that down, Jim? Is it because you know I love Count Chocula?"
"BLOOD ALONE MOVES THE WHEELS OF HISTORY! [pause] Have you ever asked yourselves in an hour of meditation - which everyone finds during the day - how long we have been striving for greatness? [bangs fist] Not only the years we've been at war – the war of work – but from the moment as a child, when we realize the world could be conquered. It has been a lifetime struggle [bangs fists again] a never-ending fight, I say to you [bangs again] and you will understand that it is a privilege to fight. WE ARE WARRIORS! [applause] Salesmen of north-eastern Pennsylvania, I ask you once more rise and be worthy of this historical hour. [even bigger applause as Dwight gives a horrible sounding laugh] No revolution is worth anything unless it can defend itself. Some people will tell you salesman is a bad word. They’ll conjure up images of used car dealers, and door to door charlatans. This is our duty to change their perception. I say, salesman – and women – of the world... unite! We must never acquiesce, for it is together... TOGETHER THAT WE PREVAIL. WE MUST NEVER CEDE CONTROL OF THE MOTHERLAND..."
"When I die. I want to be frozen. And if they have to freeze me in pieces, so be it. I will wake up stronger than ever, because I will have used that time, to figure out exactly why I died. And what moves I could have used to defend myself better now that I know what hold he had me in."
"When you become close with someone, you develop a kind of sixth sense. You can read their moods like a book. And right now, the title of Michael's book is.. 'Something Weird Is Going On...colon...What Did Jan Say? The Michael Scott Story...by Michael Scott. With Dwight Schrute.'"
Schrute And Company Quotes:
Jim Halpert: This came out really well. There you go.
Dwight Schrute: This is humongous. I am not a security threat. And, my middle name is "Kurt", not "Fart."
Jim Halpert: [squinting to read] What did I write?
Michael Scott: Okay, attention everyone. The drug testing has been cancelled. Instead I will be going around to each of you, and doing a visual inspection.
Dwight Schrute: No, you can't do that.
Michael Scott: I can do that, it's my office...and...
Dwight Schrute: [interrupting] No you cannot. It has to be official, and IT HAS TO BE URINE.
Michael Scott: Dwight! Hey is it me or does this place smell like updog?
Dwight Schrute: What's up dog?
Michael Scott: Gotcha! Hahaha, oh [gosh]... crap. Nothin', how you doing?
Dwight Schrute: Good, how are you doing?
[Jim put Dwight's wallet into the vending machine]
Dwight Schrute: Where's my wallet?
Jim Halpert: Oh there it is, 'J1'.
Dwight Schrute: I don't have any...
Jim Halpert: Here, have some nickels.
Dwight Schrute: [putting nickels into vending machine] 5, 10, 15, 20, 25...
Dwight Schrute: Oh, hey. Listen, Jim. Here's a little tip for your performance review.
Jim Halpert: Okay.
Dwight Schrute: Tell Michael that we should be stocking more of the double-tabbed manila file folders.
Jim Halpert: We don't have double-tabbed manila file folders.
Dwight Schrute: Oh yes we do.
Jim Halpert: No we don't.
Dwight Schrute: Yeah, it's a new product. So you should just suggest that to him, and then he'll be sure to give you a raise. [smirks at camera]
Jim Halpert: All right. [pause] Well, I'm not asking for a raise. I'm going to actually be asking for a pay decrease.
Dwight Schrute: Uh, that is so stupid. What if he gives it to you?
Jim Halpert: Then I win.
Michael Scott: Look, Dwight here is a wuss. When we rented "Armageddon", he cried at the end of it!
Dwight Schrute: Michael, I told you! It was because it was New Year's Eve and it started to snow at exactly midnight!
Michael Scott: [As Dwight crying] "Oh, are they really gonna leave Bruce Willis on the asteroid? Boo-hoo!"
Dwight Schrute: Through concentration, I can raise and lower my cholesterol at will.
Pam: Why would you want to raise your cholesterol?
Dwight Schrute: So I can lower it.
Dwight Schrute: OK, first let's go over some parameters. How many people can I fire?
Michael Scott: Uh, none. You're picking a healthcare plan.
NOW. There are millions more, but I'm too lazy.
I'm really excited about making my CGNU shirt tonight. :)
Hugs on the other hand...
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